Posted by: Anastacio Martinez | April 27, 2011

The Importance Of Surrounding Yourself With The Right People

Surround yourself with the best of the best and you’ll produce the results of the best of the best.”  Jim Bunch

Profound isn’t it?  Let me explain to you what I mean by surrounding yourself with the right people.  Do you know that in 5, 10 and 20 years your are going to be the results of the five most important things that you are doing right now… and those 5 things are:

  1. What you read
  2. What you listen to
  3. What you see or watch
  4. Seminars or workshops you attend
  5. Who you spend your time with  (in other words your associations)

Do you have any idea which one is the most critical and important one?

You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” Jim Rohn

Well said Jim…

Yes!!! The number five is the pivotal point that will define your life and what lies on the road ahead.  I want you to focus your attention on  number five. Why? Associations are like elevators…Some will take you up and some will take you down.

Elevators that take you down are those people that complain, blame, judge, gossip and they normally have a disease called “excusitis”.  Do you know people like this? Maybe you go to your family, your spouse or your closest friend with a great idea and they tell you all the reasons why you can’t do it.  Maybe you take a lunch break with a few co-workers and they start gossiping about other coworkers or perhaps about their spouses and their bosses. All the bad stuff.

Do you want to surround with this type of people? Or would you prefer to surround yourself with a high-class person of what I call the 3E’s? People, who empower, encourage and expand.  These people elevate your thinking, ideas, vision, dreams and support you all the way up to the pinnacle of your most fascinating goals and aspirations.  You tell me… I already made my decision and you probably know my answer.

Great minds talk about ideas, average minds talk about events and small minds talk about people.” Unknown

To make this point even more clear I want to share a story of a group of people who lived in a very small neighborhood who decided to create a pessimist club. You can see everything in this world, but a club of pessimist!!! Yes you heard me right.

There was a leader in this community who called everyone who was interested in get the ball rolling and starting this selective pessimist club. Finally, they all gathered in a house and they started to brainstorming about how awesome would it be to create such an elite group of pessimist. All of a sudden one of them said, “It’s was impossible because no one has done it before.”  Then another started saying, “It wouldn’t work because they didn’t had a place to meet” and finally the leader announced, “It’s way too complicated to start this club because involves a lot of responsibility.”  At the end of the meeting everyone left disappointed and concluded that starting a pessimist club was a bad idea. “Likes attract likes”.

This is great story because it shows you the importance of surrounding yourself with the right people.

  • If you want to be more successful you have to start hanging out with more successful people.
  • If you want to be in the greatest shape of your life you have start hanging out with people who are in a better shape than you.
  • If you are an employee and you want to become an entrepreneur you have start hanging out with other entrepreneurs and so on and so on.

Let’s do an exercise. Make a list of all the people that you spend the most time with on a regular basis. For example friends, spouse, family, coworkers, neighbors, etc…

When you have completed your list, go back and put the letter (T) next to those people who are toxic and negative and put the letter (N) to those people who nourished and encouraged you to be great. This is a very powerful exercise from the book “The Power of Focus” by Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen & Les Hewitt.

Make a conscious decision to hang out with people who you personally strive to become.

When it comes to relationships you have the authority to pick for yourself who is going to be in your inner circle of friends. You can choose a pessimist, problem oriented and low standard people or you can pick optimist, goal oriented and very enthusiastic people who enrich your environment.

Remember I am not saying that you should run away from all your friends and your loved ones (family).  I am not saying that you shouldn’t listen to a friend who is having a hardship financially or maybe going through a though an emotional roller coaster in a relationship with their spouse. Those are situations for us to give them hope and encouragement. Opportunities to be the light on the dark.

Key question to ask yourself… Are there people in your life who constantly are acting as a radio station spreading bad news, blaming other for their circumstances, complaining about the bad economy that we are in and disempowering you from your dreams?  Are certain relationships dragging you down? If so, then is time to run as fast as you can and as far as you can from these people (unless they are family). It’s the time to make fresh new friends.

There are plenty of places to find the right people. Attend workshops, seminars, lectures, retreats and symposiums by those have already achieved the success you want to achieve. Volunteer to serve with other leaders in your community, church or at your favorite charity. Join a professional group or association. Attend professional conferences. Join a country club. Flight first-class or business class whenever you can because of the people you will meet.

Remember, make a priority to build a relationship and support group with those who will push you closer to your dreams and goals. Ask them to share their success strategies with you and make sure to emulate what you think is the best for you.

Like this? Be sure to share this with all your Facebook friends, tweet this to your bird’s followers and link this to your professional network in LinkedIn. I know they will appreciate you :-).

Thanks for stopping by!!!

You are a CHAMPION :-).

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  1. This post was even better than the first! I agree totally! I want you to know: YOU and LYDIANA are part of those who will push ME closer to MY dreams and goals. Thank you, and love you guys!

    • I really appreciate that. I hope I can pull out the right words, ideas & resources to be a better writer every time I write.

  2. Well said, Anastacio. A good friend of mine always reminds me to “look at my mirrors”—meaning the people I surround myself with as we are reflections of each other. I’m really inspired by your recent articles!

    • That’s a great exercise. Thank you very much for reading & for be an active community member. Make sure to spread the word so other people in you circle of friend could benefit from it too.

  3. I totally agree with you my friend! And maybe one of the must difficult things in life is to pick the right relationships. It’s difficult too to quit the toxic relationships. I would say that one great way to gather and maintain an elite circle is to form or meet with a Master Mind Group.

    Keep the good work brother!

    • Great point with the mastermind. Definitely the MM will take you to a whole new level.

      Thanks for the suggestion!!!

  4. Great point about not discarding those who may be having a hard time or be in need; sticking with them is a great chance to practice giving back!


    • Nice to see you around Larry. Thanks for reminding me about that. When I wrote the first draft I didn’t included that special part. But later doing some reflection on the article I realize the opportunities that sometimes we have like you said to give back. It’s very powerful when we can help.

      Thanks for stopping by 🙂

  5. Great Job, keep inspiring people!

  6. This is a very interesting topic! I would say that most of the time we don’t even notice how much we are being influenced by the people we surround ourselves with. So in order to reach the desire level of success it’s very important to hang out with the right people (3E’s) by doing that we will have no choice but to be successful.

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